NOTES FROM THE SERMON.

SERMON AUDIO.

RANDY ALCORN ARTICLE, “PURITY: WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW” THAT SERVED AS A BASIS FOR OUR STUDY.

MARS HILL CHURCH RESOURCE ON OVERCOMING PORNOGRAPHY ADDICTION.

We also received several written questions on the topic and have tried to answer several of them here. Tell us what you think!  Thanks!

WIDEAWAKE: Answers to Your Questions on Purity

Where is “sexual immorality” defined?

In the New Testament “immorality” usually translates the Greek word pornea ( 1 Cor 6:18) – where we get our modern word pornography. Pornea is sort of an umbrella word that means “sexual sin”.  The Bible uses some more specific words to describe different types of pornea. Adultery (Exodus 20:14) is when a married person has sex with someone not their spouse. Fornication is when a single person has sex with anyone. Lust (Matt 5:28) is when a person thinks sexual thoughts about any person not their spouse.  However, a more helpful approach than asking “what is forbidden” might be “what is God’s best?” And that answer is clear. Sexuality was designed by God to be enjoyed by a man and woman in lifelong marriage for the purpose of pleasure, protection, procreation, and oneness (Genesis 2:24-25). Anything outside of that definition is immorality.

If sex is good, how did it become sinful?

Sex never became sinful; it is a good gift from God that comes with an instruction manual that says “use in the context of marriage.” You can misuse any good thing. In fact, one definition of sin could be “misusing one of God’s good gifts”. Take worship for instance. God created worship so we could worship HIM. But if we instead worship something else (an idol, a possession, an experience) then it is sinful. Or food. Food in enjoyable and necessary in order to live. However, if you gluttonize yourself and eat unhealthy food, your health will suffer. Likewise, sex is a good gift from God and it comes with an instruction manual that says, “for use only in marriage.” To use it that way is good, and to use it any other way only brings hurt, shame, and destruction. Genesis 2:24-25 describes God’s creation & intention for marriage and sexuality. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.  And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Is there such a thing as a “perfect” Christian dating relationship?

There is no such thing as a “perfect” relationship because relationships involve people.  People are not perfect, we are sinners in need of Christ’s salvation (Rom 3:23).  We bring our sinful tendencies into our relationships.   We are inclined to be selfish and do selfish things.  In a healthy Christian relationship, however, we obey Scripture and seek forgiveness when we wrong the other person.   Some relationships are much BETTER than others. If in your relationship you are seeking Christ and seeking the good of the other person… if you are willing to obey Jesus even when it difficult, then your relationship will bring much more honor to Jesus then if you just do whatever selfish thing you want.  Also, the Gospel says that when you fall short and sin, forgiveness and restoration are available through Jesus’ perfect life, death, and resurrection.

Is it possible to not mess up even once?

If you mean is it possible for a couple to date and never to commit physical sexual immorality, then the answer is YES. We’ve seen couples who never held hands until they were engaged and never kissed until they were married, and now have wonderfully happy marriages.  1 Timothy 5:2 tells Christian men and women to treat one another like brothers and sisters. A good brother protects and loves his sister and would  never dishonor her or take advantage of her. It should be the goal of every Christian couple to never once sin sexually.  And you can do it! Don’t date until you’re ready and mature enough for marriage. Don’t date until you’ve made clear commitments to be pure till marriage. If you’re dating and are engaging in immorality – take a break from the relationship until you can get this area under control. Ask God for strength. Get an older man, woman or couple to help you be accountable. You can do it!

I didn’t understand the “kissing thing”. How can it be sinful sometimes, but not others?

Great question. One of our teaching points was, “Since God doesn’t want us to have premarital sex, neither does he want us to do that which prepares you for premarital sex.” In other words, an activity might not be sinful in and of itself, but if it causes you to become aroused, you shouldn’t do it. Kissing is never forbidden in Scripture. (In fact the New Testament says, “greet one another with a Holy kiss” four times!) There are some kisses that are not sexual; for instance I kiss my son on the forehead when I put him to bed each night. However, kissing can be an extremely sexual act where one or both people become aroused. Generally men become aroused much quicker than women and almost any kissing will cause this to happen. Christians should avoid this kind of kissing.  Until marriage, of course!

Define lust. Is it lust if you are not focusing on a specific person or image?

Interesting question. A simple definition of lust is having sexual thoughts about a person who is not your spouse. Jesus forbids lust (Matt 5:28) and Christians should strive to guard their heart against it. I’m assuming your question might actually be about masturbation – ie. Is it acceptable to masturbate if you’re not using pornography or imagining sex with another person.  While there Bible rarely speaks directly about masturbation, I can’t really imagine that it would be possible to do it without lusting.

What if we know the truth of the Scripture and are sinning sexually but don’t feel guilty, bad, or shameful about it?

I would ask you to seriously consider whether you are actually a Christian.  Ezekiel 36:26 describes becoming a Christian as having a heart of stone (cold, dead, unresponsive) and being given a heart of flesh (living, responsive, tender).  When God saves a Christian, it’s not just that your sins are forgiven, you become a new person (2 Corinthians 5:17). Whereas previously, your heart was dead to God and his commands, now the deepest desire of your heart is to love and honor Christ. If you can continue in willing sin, and you know but don’t care that it grieves God, then you may not actually be a Christian. I would encourage you to seek God, ask for your heart to be broken for sin, and call out to Jesus for salvation. Don’t stop until you have assurance of your salvation!

Want to be personally involved and connected with UTA BSU / BSM?  We want to know!

Volunteer: There are lot’s of opportunities for you to volunteer.  Let us know if you have specialezed skills – contracting, law, marketing, business, etc.  We could use your talents.  Interested in ministry opportunities?  You can work with international students, volunteer to come on trips, help with building projects and more.

BSM Building

Mailing Lists: Help us network and communicate with you.  Send us your postal address so we can include you in mailouts.  Receive our email newsletter with monthly updates.  Join the Alumni Facebook Group to newtwork with other former students.  It would be ESPECIALLY helpful for you to put us in touch with other former students.  We are working to re-establish contact with those who are part of this ministry’s great heritage.  Could you send us contact information for anyone you know?

Donations:  A substantial portion of our operating expenses, including %100 of our interns’ support, comes from individual donors.  Visit our financial support page to learn how to make a tax-deductible contribution.  Donations allow us to continue meeting students, discipling believers, sharing the Gospel, and taking trips.

Turner Falls Camping Trip - 1991

Parents: We consider ministering to your children a God given privilege.  We want to communicate prayer requests and needs to you, so please sign up for the newsletter and never hesitate to contact us with a question or concern.

Alumni Meetings: We host occasional gatherings for alumni and their families.  Make sure you are on the mailing list to stay informed.

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ALSO, VISIT OUR DONATION PAGE FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT SUPPORTING BSM INCLUDING ONLINE GIVING.

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Many people find it easy and convenient to set up automatic monthly giving to BSM.  Most banks allow you to do this using the online bill pay feature.  Typically, there is no charge to use this feature and your bank will even pay for postage to mail the check.  Here are a few simple steps:

1. Log on to your bank account on your bank’s website.
2. Go to the bill pay section and select “add a payee”.
3. Add the BSM as a payee

Baptist Student Ministry

PO Box 195429

Arlington, TX 76019

817-277-4195

1. After you have added BSM as a payee, you will schedule a repeating payment.  Go to the bill pay section, select “schedule a payment”, then indicate you would like to set up a repeating payment.
2. You then will choose the amount you want to give and the start date.  You will also choose an end date or term: six months, twelve months, indefinite, etc.
3. When you are done, you will usually have to confirm that all the information is correct, and you’re done!

Automatic giving is also very helpful to BSM.  It allows us to budget and plan ministry around this income.  Thank you for considering giving in this manner.

Contact us at info@utabsm.com or 817-277-4195 and inquire about our current needs.  You can also submit a general donation and we’ll use it where it is needed most.  You can donate by submitting a secure payment online using a credit card or Pay Pal:

Make a donation:

You can also mail in a contribution.  (This is best for larger donations as it avoids transaction fees.)  Make checks payable to “BSM” and send them to:

Set up automatic monthly giving ($100/month):

Set up automatic monthly giving ($50/month):

Gary & Teresa Stidham

Originally from west Texas, Gary has served as Director of the Baptist Student Ministry since 2003. He enjoys spending time with people and helping them grow in their faith. He’s also a pretty good ping-pong player…so steer clear if you’re not up to it. Gary’s wife, Teresa, is the BSM office manager.  Together they have two sons, Josh (9 years old) and Ben ( 6 years old).

Christi Brazile
Associate Director
Christi has been our Associate Director for over seven years, now. She’s a graduate of Texas Tech, but is now firmly planted in Mavs land. Christi is an acomplished musician and a tri-athelete. She is an expert on healthy eating and mentoring college students to follow Christ.

Brooke Brandon
Intern
Brooke grew up in Fort Worth and is a proud Texas A&M Aggie. She spent three years living and working in Southeast Asia and joined the BSM staff in 2009. Brooke loves sharing the love of Christ with people and helping girls grow in their faith.

Patty Herrera
Intern
Patty is the newest member of the BSM staff.  She is a recent UTA graduate and is serving as an intern at the BSM for the 2010-2011 year.  Patty is from Houston and has been a student leader in BSM for the last four years.

There are lots of great churches in the UTA area!
Be sure to check these out. They are great
supporters of BSM and a great place for you.
BSM is also supported by the BGCT and the TBA.

121 Community Church
Celebration Fellowship
Church on Rush Creek
Connect Church
Fielder Road Baptist Church
First Baptist Church Arlington
First Baptist Church Mansfield
First Baptist Church Euless
Lamar Baptist Church
Lake Arlington Baptist Church
MacArthur Blvd Baptist Church
Meadow Lane Baptist Church
Mosaic Arlington
Redeemer Church
Retta Baptist Church
South Oaks Baptist Church
Southfield Christian Fellowship
Tate Springs Baptist Church
The Oaks Baptist Church
Travis Avenue Baptist Church
University Baptist Church
University Baptist Church, Fort Worth
The Village Church
Walnut Ridge Baptist Church
Woods Chapel Baptist Church

The BSM at UT Arlington rests on some amazing foundations. There is a long legacy of students being won for Christ and built up in Christ. If you are a former student, we want to connect with you and help you stay connected to us. Join our ALUMNI FACEBOOK GROUP and join our alumni mailing list:

Sign up for our Email Newsletter

Make sure you click the “Alumni” box and unclick the “BSM News & Events” box.

Join 200-plus UTA students for a free meal and a short inspirational program.  We are always done by 12:30 so you have plenty of time to get to class or work.  Invite a friend, bring your appetite, and come to Noondays!

Make new friends and learn about other cultures!  Every Thursday we enjoy free pizza, salad, and dessert.  (There are always vegetarian options.)  American students show hospitality to our international friends by doing set up & clean up, and serving the food.  Then, everyone sits together, eats, plays games, and builds friendships.